“If it doesn’t scare you, it is probably not worth doing at all.”
Summary
Don't Let The Fear Win By Greg Faxon
The author is a former All-American wrestler, world-class Spartan Racer, coach to entrepreneurs and other coaches, and a teacher with an extraordinarily clear style and generous heart.
A core assumption of the book is the following equation (from Timothy Gallwey):
Performance = Potential - Interference
Since human potential is limitless, this means your performance can be too.
All you need to do is, “identify what’s stopping you, clarify your vision, and then taking tangible steps toward building your ultimate business.”
The core idea of the book: to become a champion entrepreneur you have to regularly confront your fears. Doing anything else — even if it appears productive — is actually what the author calls “creative avoidance.” This includes:
General busyness
Researching your competition too much
Obsessing over new tools and tactics
Etc.
Other core ideas (also explained below):
Big You / Little You. Big You is the part of yourself that wants to give your gifts to the world. It’s driven by love. Little You is the part of you that is afraid and doesn’t want to be rejected or forgotten. To become the champion you’re meant to be, you want Big You to love Little You. Don’t try to squash it. Instead have self-compassion. Big you needs to love, take care, listen, and make space for Little You to feel safe and grow. Just like a parent and a child. As Big You guides Little You, you’ll more successfully confront, and grow from, your fears.
Inner Game / Outer Game. In any activity (e.g. sports, business, etc.) there is an outer game and an inner game. The outer game includes things like strategies, tactics, techniques. Inner game is about beliefs, mindsets, and emotional habits. Most people spend 90% of their time on the outer game, when in fact they’d be better off spending 90% on the inner game. This is an example of creative avoidance.
The author shares many more powerful ideas, including several mindset shifts.
Core Concepts
Performance = Potential - Interference
You already have success within you
Just need to identify what’s stopping you, clarify your vision, and take tangible steps toward that vision
From Timothy Gallwey
Outer Game - strategies, tactics, techniques.
Most people give this 90% of their effort.
Inner Game - beliefs, mindsets, emotional habits.
Most people give this 10% of their effort.
It's not about pep talks. It’s about exposing lies slowing you down.
Creative Avoidance - the subconscious act of using your imagination to prioritize peripheral tasks in order to avoid taking action on scarier, more important tasks.
Invisible
Covers tracks
Rooted in fear
Common methods of creative avoidance:
#1 for entrepreneurs: selling
Saying “yes” to things that don’t align with (business) goals
Collecting more tools/apps
Gathering more information
General busyness
Fear
Fear isn’t the problem. The problem is our learned reaction to it
Melt fear by starting a keystone habit (e.g. the author was afraid of writing, so he started with blog posts every week, then wrote a 16 page PDF, then this 60 page book)
Pick something that gives you butterflies but doesn’t paralyze you
Common fears:
Competing with the best
Rejection
Being forgotten
Little You - The scared child inside you
Driven by fear
Doesn’t want rejection or to be forgotten. Wants to be kept safe.
Triggered by uncertainty, judgement, fear of looking stupid
Big You - The confident, giving parent inside you
Driven by love
Gives it’s gift.
Big You needn’t dominate Little You. Don’t beat it down. Instead, listen to it. Acknowledge it. Love it. Take care of it. Keep it safe. Provide independence and confidence to grow.
High Intention Low Attachment (HILA)
Give energy to what you can control (process) not what you can’t control (outcomes)
Process
What you have control over (e.g. how hard you work, how much fun you have, how present you are)
Celebrate the process more than the results!
Vision
Something you can see in mind’s eye
Clear, specific, focus/narrow on something specific
Beyond the self
The change you most want to make for people
This is your Why, and it inspires others to join you
It’s different from your mission
After finding your vision, pick a trackable metric (for many entrepreneurs it’s minutes spent in sales calls each day)
Your Team
It’s not just employees. Acknowledge this, and give it energy and attention
Includes:
Contractors
Assistants
Colleagues
Referral partners
Family
Friends
Team works best if each person is in their zone of genius
Move toward shared vision using clear agreements and communication
Synergy
Anxiety
Lower it by:
Minimizing anticipation
Maximizing being in flow
Do this by:
Develop presence. Notice around you, mindfulness, breathing before a call
Momentum. Small consistent steps toward vision. Stop planning and focus on next Most Important Thing. When is the time to plan, when execute?
Keystone Habit
A simple habit to engrain
Start small and work up (e.g. taking a cold shower, doing body weight exercises in the morning, etc.)
The Loop
Checking competitor’s websites and social media endlessly
Self perception theory - we draw inferences about who we are based on our behavior. Attitudes follow actions. So act like a champion now.
Busyness
Rooted in unclear priorities
Solve by creating space (e.g. meditating). Then ask: “What is the next scary action I need to take?”
Healthy Rituals (e.g. morning/daily/weekly)
Touch emotional, intellectual, physical aspects
Mindset Shifts / Reframing
Bravery
It's for the chosen few => It's actually a muscle you can strengthen
Fear
Champions are fearless => Champions feel fear and do it anyway
Selling
It's manipulative => it's transformative
“Selling is one of the most important services that you provide”
Help them invest in the underlying benefit (e.g. magic, wonder, awe, adventure)
It's ancillary => It's an extension of your product/service
Make it more fun
Focus on what you can control (# times you ask, creating content) not on what you can't control (actual sales, content going viral)
Anything that feels icky about selling can be done in another way
#1 thing entrepreneurs creatively avoid
Entrepreneurship
It's about the money => It’s a “channel through which you can actualize fullest potential”
Productivity
It comes from doing more and more => It comes from doing less (and making space for new ways to emerge)
Clarity
It comes from eureka moments => It comes from taking action
You Personal Worthiness
It comes from outer success => You are already 100% worthy
Your Opponent
Your opponent is other people => Your opponent is you.
Inner game is critical
Obstacles
They are roadblocks => They are another way to become the champion you’re meant to be
Focus on external obstacles => focus on inner game
Coaching
I can go it alone => every elite performer needs a coach
What is Valuable
Learn more, work harder, adhere to status quo => Overcome creative avoidance, be vulnerable, become best in world at what you do, be brave enough and put in emotional labor to connect to others
Giving Your Gifts
It’s just a nice thing to do => You're actually morally obligated to give your gifts (think of the folks who would love to give their gifts but can't because they are incapacitated)
Work/Life Balance
It’s possible => Instead, focus on integrating, synergizing all components of life
Champions
They are driven to win (or not to lose) => They are driven by love (of process, of work, of craft, of serving clients)
They act like champions after they win => They act like champions before they win
Champions act “as if” they already are champions.
How would you act if you were already a champion?
What would Richard Branson, Oprah, or Elon Musk do?